Escapism

After a disappointing work-related meeting today, I’ve dipped again. Now I have additional things to worry about, job-wise.

On the advice of my best online rubber buddy, (yes, you!), I put on my rubber shirt. My fetish life is my escape from the real world. A chance to clear my mind and be one with myself. My second skin is the one I can truly be comfortable in.

As I sat here, in front of the computer, feeling the rubber tightening around my body, my hands start feeling my body through it. I feel comfortable and reassured. My mind drifts. I close my eyes and think of S and what happened on Sunday, replaying the same thoughts that I’ve been having every night just before I fall asleep, and the first thing when I wake up in the morning. I feel calm and relaxed, a little tingly with chills running up my spine, but also a strong longing for his touch and cuddles which I already miss so much.

Is this what love feels like? Am I in love? I can’t say for sure. But at this time I can only remember the good time I had and cherish it, until the next time I get to see him again.

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