So, I’ve let this blog rot and it has been years since the last post back when it was originally hosted on Blogger. I’ve imported all my blog posts from the old site into WordPress on this domain now. Surprisingly, I still sometimes get feedback and messages about stuff I wrote all those years ago, and it seems like the one about the Aneros has gotten quite a few people interested in trying it. I should probably write a follow-up to that ;)

Things have been fairly quiet for me on the fetish front for the past couple of years. I had been in a unhappy relationship leading to a messy break-up a few years ago. I wasn’t happy at work then and ended up in depression without even realising it. I stopped going to to gay and fetish dance parties because I was fed up with the pretentious scene. I hardly enjoyed myself at those events, and never get what I want out of them, often going home feeling empty and sorry for myself.

Since moving up to Sydney around this time last year, things have gotten MUCH better. I’m actually feeling quite upbeat nowadays. The job I moved up there for has been good and everything I hoped for. My partner ‘A’ also moved up here with me, and I’m glad he did. I’ve also got a bit more free time and have been pursuing my other hobbies and interests such as photography.

The Sydney rubber scene is dismal, there aren’t a lot of venues and events catering to the fetish community. The Sydney Leather Pride Association organises some stuff, but I’ve only been to a couple of things so far. It also doesn’t help that there isn’t a permanent venue like a local leather bar where one can just go out in gear for a few drinks and hang out with their friends or meet new, like-minded people.

I haven’t been in touch with my rubber fetish very much in the past few years, but one thing I decided to do this year is to attend Mr. International Rubber in Chicago. It’s something I’ve been thinking about doing for a long time now, and it’s always been pushed back due to finances or other conflicting plans. I got my MIR weekend package tickets as soon as they were publicly available online, and am now organising the other aspects of the trip. I’ve really excited about it and can’t wait for November. I’ve been to Folsom Europe in Berlin a couple of times, and Chicago seems like a long way to go for this, but MIR is an event exclusively for rubber fetishists and I’m looking forward to meeting guys from all over and finally connect with a community that is sadly missing in Australia.

This past year has seen a whole lot of changes in my life, and I’m sure this trip will also revive the development of my rubber fetish and opening myself up to new experiences.

The Year That Was

Wow. What a year it has been. A big year of growth and transformation for me. Death and rebirth.

At the time I started this blog, I was in an emotional flux, and only starting to explore my rubber fetish in earnest. I’ve since acquired some rubber gear, enough to proudly say I have a complete outfit now.

I’ve also met some interesting people and found love amidst some thorny experiences.

There was a big gap in my blog posts after that, but during that time, S and I have gotten closer and guess what, he’s my boyfriend now. It kinda crept up on us. I didn’t realize or even expect he’d be feeling the same about me. We’ve shared a lot of experiences together, and even had very similar situations happen in our respective lives. I’ve had a family tragedy this year and S was there to give me the support I needed badly at the time. He understood what I was going through and gave me a reason to live and look forward to.

I am totally at ease around S, and we’ve done a lot of exploring of my sexuality and fetish. We’ve had the most mind-blowing sex ever. He’s introduced me to mild bondage with cling-wrap, the use of amyl and breath control. We’ve given each other the most sensual full body massages. I enjoy his touch and cuddles. And it’s not always about rubber, we also enjoy plain ‘ol vanilla sex. He is caring and sensitive, yet not pushy and demanding. He nurtures me without being constricting. We sometimes have differing ideas and preferences of fun, but we always work it out and accommodate each other’s wishes.

I’ve come a long way with the awareness of who I am and what I like, sexually. I’ve also realized love comes in all shapes and sizes and that it doesn’t matter what gender that person is. I have finally learnt what real love feels like and to further confirm that, I’m missing S dearly this festive season while we’re both away at our respective family homes. I’m counting the days till I see him again.

Gas Mask

I’ve recently bought a gas mask from ebay. Although initially I never really thought of gas masks being sexy or horny, as I’ve chatted with fellow rubberists and hearing their experiences of incorporating a gas mask into their play, the idea warmed on me. I first tried on a few at Eagle Leather (a German m40 and Russian type) and it actually felt quite nice, having your head and face tightly enclosed, with the rubber or rubber-like material gripping tightly and slightly laboured breathing through the filters (and smelling the rubber.. mmm)

I didn’t buy the masks I tried on at Eagle straight away, cos I couldn’t justify the price at the time. So I went back and researched the different mask types and shopped around elsewhere, like the army disposals and on eBay. Sometime around the end of November I was just browsing on ebay and happened to see a good price for an american m17a2 gas mask, which had been recommended to me by someone. It was a bundle of the mask, plus a carry bag, chemical hood and a few other things, and the auction was ending in a few hours so I placed a bid, and surprisingly I won it. It was a pretty good price for what I was getting, but after adding shipping and money transfer fees, it wasn’t exactly as good a deal as i thought it was. At best it was similar to what I’d have paid at a local army disposal shop.

When the mask arrived I gleefully took the postal slip to the post office to collect the parcel. It was bigger and heavier than I expected. I opened the package like a kid on Christmas morning. I tried it on immediately and it was better than the other two masks I tried at Eagle. Felt awesome, but I had to rush off to work so I didn’t have time to have a good play with it. Although I ended up paying more than I would have liked, after receiving it and trying it on, I think it’s worth every cent.

Redemption Melbourne

Wow, what a weekend. Last Saturday there was a dance party called Redemption, themed ‘Spartacus’ for the Melbourne Leather Festival. Dress code called for leather, or fetish-wear like rubber, pvc or uniforms.

I went with S in full rubber, me in my rubber t-shirt and his rubber jeans, and i had bought a pair of 10-hole Doc Marten boots for the occassion. On the night itself, while changing we swapped boots as his DM’s were shiny leather and went with my outfit better. So here we were, two rubbermen on their way to a night out of fun. Just before we left, though, I suddenly became incredibly nervous about going out in public wearing rubber, especially in a full outfit from head to toe. It’s like my secret obsession and I didn’t want to be seen in it. But S calmed me down and reassured me.

First stop was to the Peel, a popular gay bar, but it was early and wasn’t too exciting, so we took a stroll down to the Laird instead. The crowd was more our kind, and there were two other rubbermen there (though they were older men and not quite to our taste). After having some drinks we caught a cab and made our way down to the city for the main event.

The party was spread over two levels, but most people were on the lower level where the dance floor was. As expected, there were more guys in leather than anything else. Seemed like it was only me and my friend in rubber. Saw a few other guys with tight skimpy shorts which might have been rubber but we couldn’t be sure. might have been PVC, but still a bit disappointing in that respect that there weren’t many rubbermen there. Besides that, it was a pretty good mixed crowd of older and younger guys. Some nice eye candy to be checked out, including a cute guy in a paramedic overall.

The music was great, and I hadn’t gone dancing in ages and it made me realize how much I missed it. I was feeling incredibly sexy while wearing full rubber, and the nervousness I had earlier had totally dissipated. I was enjoying myself among my kind of people.

Really enjoyed myself and we were there until almost 4am when we made our way back, exhausted. I had the most fun in a very long time.